We Found Love in a Naughty Place
by girlwiththeheartballoon
Summary: Rachel's acting weird and Santana doesn't care...yes she does. G!p
1. Chapter 1

**Okkk so here's the pezberry one shot that has now turned into a two shot (if this gets approved haha) that you guys decided would be G!p :) I really really like pezberry so i hope i did it _some_ justice. **

**Anywho, hope you enjoy :)!**

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><p>It's come to the point where every time Rachel turns a corner, or is coming her way, she has to duck or scurry off into another room.<p>

And god, it's not like she's a little loser, trying to hide from _Rachel Berry._

But honestly, she can't say that it's not pathetic. Totally not her fault though because it's apparently become sort of a thing where Rachel thinks she can talk to her and be friends and hang out and stuff, and that's exactly the _opposite_ of what Santana needs right now.

Not because Rachel is annoying or she hates her or because she doesn't want to be seen with her or anything. Totally not it.

But, you know, that's _exactly _the problem.

See, ever since the start of Senior year, all of a glee club has been on some kumbayaya la di da da shit and she's had to deal with it since, hi, hello, she likes being in it. But all this mushy, lovey dovey crap has been shoved so far up her ass that if they start actually holding hands and singing love songs she's going to spontaneously combust.

And because of all this shit, Rachel's been getting closer and closer to her. It's hell. She has to go through glee watching the girl give her these shy little, dare she say it, _adorable_, looks every now and then, which fuck that just squeezes her lifeless heart into action. She now has to also try and hold back on knocking the ever living crap out of everyone she gives that perfect, bright eyed and blinding smile to though because she's been given that same smile a lot now and, well, fuck if that's not supposed to only be reserved for her.

_Damn it._

Do you see the kind of things she has to go through on the daily now?

This is why it was better and easier for them to be hating each other. At least when Santana made fun of her, and Rachel was giving her these mad looks, all she had on her mind was angry sex.

But now?

Well, shit if it's not all gone to hell.

"Santana!" Speak of the dwarfy devil.

Eyes rolling, her feet come to a halt in the middle of the hallway, and she turns around.

"What do you- _shit._"

Holy mother of hell.

"Ahem, excuse me Santana, but my eyes are up here." Well you can't fuckin' blame her, christ. The top she had on wasn't even a damn top. Anyone could-

"What the fuck are you wearing? What, you just givin' everyone a free show now? Jesus, Berry, not everyone wants to see that." Her eyes rolled so hard, even she had to rub the top of her eyelids to make sure they didn't get stuck there.

Her words did nothing to wipe the stupid, maybe even sexy, smirk the hobbit had on though. It really only pissed her off more and she took a small step back to keep from pushing the girl away from her.

"Well, I'm not looking for _everyone _to watch, just the one."

"The fuck are you going on abou-"

"Come with me."

So she went with her, what of it?

She was only struck stupid because the midget had like, nothing on, and hey, she's not fucking blind, Ok? She's also no one's bitch but she followed because she knew what Rachel was like when things didn't go her way and she was sort of curious so- yeah.

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><p>"Alright, what's the dealio here, cause I gots me a date at-"<p>

"I recommend you cancel it because you're not leaving until I'm done with you." Rachel's all of a sudden real close to her and her back hits the whiteboard trying to back up but personal breathing space doesn't apply to this fucking girl apparently.

It's almost disconcerting the way Berry is outright flirting with her, but she's gotta give her props for having the ovaries to do it. Soft, not at all manly, hands tickle her arms, sliding up until they get to her shoulders, and then coming back down to pry open her balled fists.

Fuck, there goes that jittery feeling in her heart again.

She exhales softly, trying to lose some of that weird shit she's got goin' on inside her, but then Rachel's thumbs are circling her wrist.

"San..." She looks down at her, gulping now at the look she's being given and the way shorter girl's eyelashes flutter. "Can I call you San?"

"Y-yeah, sure, whatever." She shrugs her shoulders and fails badly at trying to look like she doesn't give a shit. For fucks sakes, she can practically _hear_ the little shiver her body gives off at how coy Rachel's being.

"Well, _San_, you're a very hard person to get alone, you know that?" She almost sounds frustrated, and oh yeah, this is Rachel and she should not be cowering like a little shit because hi, hello, _she's_ the one who's supposed to be in power.

So she stands a little straighter, puts her haughty face on, like yeah, this totally isn't affecting her. "I have places to be, people to do, and all that jazz. I mean what can I say, I'm a very needed person around these parts."

And just like that, a stupid, like, _know it all, _giggle comes out of Rachel. Her eyebrows furrow and she gives off a sneer. "What's so fucking funny?"

Rachel doesn't really say anything, just keeps giving her this look that kind of sets something off in her jeans. But she ignores the fuck out of that, because no way is this midgey little shit going to embarrass her by giving her a boner.

Except, _damn it_, she can't exactly ignore the way Rachel bites her bottom lip, or steps a bit closer. She's really starting to get nervous, although, whatever, it's just cause this is the longest she's been alone with Rachel, in like, _ever_.

There's a finger running down the front of her shirt, tickling her abs, and she snatches it between her fingers. "What is it that you want, Berry?"

Rachel gasps, and _fu-_ "I just want _you,_" ok so she gulps. Shut the fuck up though, cause it was like a tiny one. "to understand that there's only one person you're going to do and only one place you'll need to be."

She's kind of got an idea of what the fuck is going on but- "Oh yeah? And just _who_ is that person, hm?"

The finger in her hand wiggles out of her hold, fists her shirt, and _pulls._ She's up against Rachel fast, and a growl rips out of her throat because jesus _christ_, there's all of a sudden a hand gripping her junk and- _"Me."_

_Shit._

Her eyes widen and she's breathing hard, waiting for something to happen. Anything. Having her brain come back to functioning order once more would be great too. But then both hands grip just a little harder, just once, and let her go with a push and a smirk and she's left _really_ stupid just watching her go- no, _sway_ away.

There's a throbbing _everywhere_ and- "Hija de la chingada _madre, _what in the fuck!"

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><p>So, pretty much there's no avoiding Rachel. Like, at all.<p>

Two days after that- whatever the hell it was- she had been oh so sure that that spout of confidence Rachel somehow had attained was long gone. It was like nothing had ever happened the next day. Rachel went about her day like normal, with those fugly kinda cute sweaters and short as fuck skirts that just-

It was all good the day before, is what she's getting at.

Now yesterday was totally different.

So, she was all up on her daily routine, getting checked out here and there, right? Turning down offers and shit while putting shit in her locker yesterday when-

"_Hey Santana, doing anything this Saturday?" _

"_Well, well, if it isn't little _Carlita Saudemeyer."_ She tips her head back to check her out because she's been anything but little since the eighth grade and all of it is just nice and well rounded and- "What can I do for you?"_

"_Come ov-"_

_There's a bang! right next to her locker, in between her and Carla, and _Rachel_ is all of a sudden right up in her face, those soft, stupid hands tightening around her wrists."She can take a step back and walk away." _

"_Hey-"_

_She turns around in front of her, and with both hands, grips Santana's wrists harder and pulls her so that her front is being practically smashed into Rachel's ass, arms around her middle._

_Fuck, she chokes._

"_Have a nice day, Carl_ita_." She says it with a final tone, like she's got a say in what the fuck is going on, but before she can say anything, Carla's walking away, shaking her head._

_Santana's arms grip around her hips and Rachel moans so lightly that she almost doesn't hear it but she does and that makes her choke again. The little twerp just laughs all cutesy and shit and she bumps her front, _hard, _which, damn it, her arms go slack and she takes off, turning around only to wink and put her finger in the air to point at Santana and make an up and down motion with, like an elevator, and then pointing back at herself and mouthing, "Mine."_

Honestly, she ain't even mad she had to go to the unused janitors closet on the second floor to jerk one off to that.

Anyway, now she was on her way to her car. No berry stare downs or random passerby gropings took place today. Rachel being all sex personified and flirty like kind of, actually- and just don't even go there with thinking she's a little chicken shit but- it scares her. Not cause she's gonna go running for the hills or anything, but- it, well, it's not who she was _damn it_.

Rachel wasn't one of those girls who, like Carla, was all about sex. She liked that about her.

Ok, so she liked her, whatever.

Not a big deal.

S'kind of the reason why it bugs her that Rachel's acting all weird and glee's makin em all get closer to one another. Well, it _used_ to bug her. Cause now it's like Rachel actually likes her or something. Then again, with the way she's been acting, it could be that its only for her dick.

And ok, so she's not exactly the biggest stud in Mckinley or anything, but, shes pretty high up there. Not _everybody_ knew about her extra package, but most of the girls around here with a brain did, and it surprisingly didn't make her like a pariah or anything.

_Clearly, _cause like, she's not trying to brag, but once word gets around that she's got a niner, well that shit goes _around._

"Fuck, I'm _so_ a stud." She chuckles to herself, unlocks her car door, hops in and throws her bag in the back. She adjusts her seat back just a bit and sighs. Maybe tomorrow she could talk to Rachel without letting the girl turn it into a sexual little game. Cause, yeah she's a sexual person, but, it's not all she thought about.

God, give her some credit.

Just as she's about to turn the car on, there's a rustle in the back and she turns her head to check it out. Out of like fucking _nowhere_ there's a flash of polka dots and brown hair and tan legs and then there's _Rachel_ on her lap.

Her eyes go wide."What the fuck, Berry, how the hell did you get in here!"

"Shush, _'Tana._" There's a little wriggle, and as much as she's sort of freaked the fuck out, she clenches her hands around the sides of her leather seat cause, well, Rachel's ass is nice and moving on top of her and she smells like cinnamon and vanilla and sex ok.

...

Wow, cause _that _really helps her argument on not only being about the sex.

But come on can you blame her?

She's snapped out of it when Rachel giggles, probably at the stupid look on her face, and then stops wriggling to get comfortable, and instead starts sliding down her body slowly.

She puts her hands out to stop whatever it is that Rachel's thinking about doing, but then her hands get slapped away and is told to- "Put them above your head and behind the head rest."

Her eyebrows scrunch together. _"Hey,_ I don't know what the fuck is going on but this is _my_ car and_ my_ body, and I don't think you have a say in what _I _get to do-"

There's a hand on her dick.

Like, over her jeans, but still, it gets her to shut up.

There's an unruly smile on Rachel's face once her eyelids finally open up and she looks down. Her eyes practically bulge out of her fucking head when the girl bites her lip and rubs her palm down the half hardened length with a good, hard pressure.

"Now, I'm only going to tell you once more; put your hands up and behind the head rest." Rachel doesn't even wait for her to fucking do that before two hands are unbuttoning her pants, one hand resting on her thigh as the other begins to tug the zipper down.

This is just too weird. Like yeah it's hot, but, what the fuck.

"Look, I don't know why you're doing this but it's kind of -"

There's a small sigh of annoyance from Rachel, and her eyebrows furrow at that. What the- _Rachel's_ getting annoyed with _her?_ Oh no, no. That just does not happen.

"Santana, just shut up and enjoy what I'm about to give you." Rachel says it all sultry like, voice dropped down a few bars, and then her hands fly up and behind the head rest to grab on for dear life because _jesus_ the girls nose tickles down her meat, nuzzling it like it's a fucking cuddly thing.

She's still got her pants and boxers on, but that's ok because she can still _feel_ everything as if she didn't. Hot air gets blown on her and she has to tell herself to keep her eyes on this no matter what because fuck if this isn't the hottest thing to ever happen to her.

Nimble hands start to slide her pants down, and she slightly lifts up, just enough so that the front opening of her boxers are in view, and Rachel fucking _hums_ like some jolly old tune as she grips the middle of her cock with a nice grip.

"_Fuck._" Rachel hasn't really even done anything yet, at least not compared to what other girls have done, but she's harder than she's ever been. This girl just does things to her, man. It's fucked up is what it is, but she's not gonna complain.

Well, anymore.

"Oh, how cute." Her eyes snap open at that, cursing herself for closing them in the first place, and looks down to see what it is that's _not_ at all cute. Because she's everything but. Rachel's fingers trip down her constrained boner and touches the clothed tip. _Oh shit._ "You're dripping." She says it all sickly sweet and she grunts, cause whatever, who the fuck _wouldn't_ be at this point.

Rachel finally just sort of like rips her boxers open and she takes a breath of relief at how free her dick feels. And then the girl's just looking at her length, taking it all in, and Santana, for the first time in a while, grimaces. What if it's like, too big? Like she hasn't had any complaints but, girls can be intimidated and stuff.

She can sympathize partially cause no way in hell would she ever want to go anywhere _near_ a dick bigger than hers. They're called _monsters_ for a reason.

But then before a word of regret and maybe a 'sorry, I'm just gonna put this away and we can forget this ever happened' stutters out of her nervous mouth, there's a little kittenish lick under her head and her pupils blow up, trembling because Rachel's are black as fuck too.

"Hmm, I could get used to this." She wants to ask exactly what the hell that means but, Rachel's soft hands are fondling her, one cupping her balls and rolling them like she's done this before (which fuck that shit cause that's not flying with her (but that's for a later discussion)) and the other pushing her cock back so that it's near her lower belly. Rachel's tongue licks a hot stripe up her nine inches and she keels, fucking _keels_ man because its warm and wet, and that pink, hot, _tongue_ pushes her hard on back by itself with just the right pressure.

Let's just say it again if it wasn't clear; _Rachel's __**tongue **__pushed her dick back._

"Ohh shit." The tip of her mushroom head gets attacked at all angles, that perfect fucking tongue licking all around it and lapping over the slit like a lollipop until she just gets sucked in and- _jesus_, her dick feels like it's just getting harder and bigger and _she _didn't even know that was possible. It's crazy how this is all happening. Never in her life- I mean, this is _Rachel_ we're talking about here. The girls like the virgin mary's daughter and- damn it that image does _not_ help.

Thing is, Who woulda thought?

Her mind comes back to the now, rolling her eyes at herself for straying away for a quick sec, and reminding herself for the fiftieth time that it's not exactly in her nature to push the head, of whoever is giving her head, down so she shouldn't be having those thoughts about doing it to Rachel.

She's not like that, and for that reason all the girls like her. She's still badass and shit but- like, she's not an asshole to girls when it comes to this.

"Fuck," she whispers out. Rachel's still just sucking the tip, not really going up or down, just suckling, like she's trying to- _oh._

"Your cum is creamy, yet not too thick." Rachel observes, letting it flop back down into it's hardened angle, watching her cum drip down her throbbing member.

She honestly doesn't know what to say to that cause, was that a compliment or- whatever. She just manages to say, "Um, y-yeah, it is." Her hands hurt from how hard her grip around the head rest is, but Rachel's still staring at her weeping cock, her left hand still juggling her balls. God, it all just feels _so, so _good, so her hands can stay in that position for all of eternity for all she cares.

"I like it," Rachel finally whispers. And her teeth bite her bottom lip from _screaming_ because the brunette slurps the cum off her erection, squeezing her balls roughly as she does so.

She's gonna cum, fucking _hell_, she's gonna cum and- and god it's fucking embarrassing as all shit but she's not going to be embarrassed because everything about this moment is so amped up and-

"R_achel!_" She doesn't mean to moan out so loud at the girl nipping at her balls and then kissing the veins on her cock, but whatever this is hot. E-except Rachel stops. Like, she actually moves back away from her member.

Rachel's eyebrows knit together and there's a curious frown on her face. "What did you just call me?"

Santana tries to rack her brain for anything bad she's said in the last ten- fifteen minutes, but she can't think of anything."Um...I don't-" Rachel's fingers pinch simultaneously at her ball sack and the tip of her head and she squeals. "_What_? God, Rachel I don't fucking-"

"_That."_ Soon as the word slips out, Rachel's plump lips slide down past her mushroom head and all the way down her quivering dick.

She _howls, _"Fuck!" Her will power is being tested to the motherfucking max as she tries not to pump her hips upward, her hands begging to slide in and take hold of soft looking brunette locks. Rachel's tongue massages the underside of her member as the tip of her nose touches the bottom of Santana's abs. She can't help but groan.

It's all just too fucking much for her right now. Like, what Rachel did to her _two days ago_ was too much. So right now? What was being done to her right at this fucking moment? It blew past that and went straight to _'Things that will always blow her mind, and her load.'_

Like it?

She just made it up.

"Say it again, say my name, _say it._" Rachel tugs on her dick forcefully and then puts her lips back on it, her head bobbing up and down and _up and down._

"Rach- fuck, Rachel, _Rachel," _It's become a mantra at this point and she's definitely not far away from exploding all over the girls face. She actually commends herself for even being able to last this long with her. But she's not sure if Rachel would appreciate that so she tries to warn her. "Rachel, Rachel- _shiiit-_ I- I'm gonna cum and-

"Mmmh, cum in my mouth, _San." _She can't believe the things coming out of the brunettes mouth, stuttering herself as she tries to just _form_ the words she needs to ask her if she's sure but that soft fucking hand is jerking her dick hard and fast, the other one holding tight onto her balls. "I want to feel you slide down my throat, baby, just cum for me. Let me eat you up and slurp down everything you've got."

Her eyes can't _not_ roll back at that. Like she can feel them practically live in the back of her head as she starts to whimper out Rachel's name. The ridges in the brunettes throat vibrate against her cock and then- then she _feels_ that same jolly fucking tune Rachel was humming just minutes ago and her mind goes blank as her member starts to spurt shots of her cum down the girls heavenly throat.

Rachel's still moaning as she swallows Santana's cum, both hands now squeezing her balls, trying to get the last of it out of her and that just sets her off again. How hot is it that a girl just can't get enough of your shit? Like, it's the hottest fucking thing. Her hands are twitching as she lets go of the head rest and Rachel's mouth plops off her still half hard cock.

"There's something about the way you taste- it just- hmmm." Santana can't believe her eyes as Rachel starts to suckle the tip of her dick again, and her head falls back. Of course, before she can get a fucking word in, Rachel's talking again. "See? You're mine." Her head jerks back up as Rachel gives one last hard suck to her mushroom head and slides back up her body, and kisses her cheek before opening the door and walking out.

She sighs, her cock still throbbing at the best head she's ever gotten. Fuck, her hands are shaking too. She places them down by her thighs, looking at her member and-

Wait.

Why did Rachel leave-

Where's Rachel going?

_Wait!_

She pushes her dick back in her boxers and tugs her pants up, zipping and buttoning, and fumbles like an idiot with no coordination trying to get out of her car. "Rachel!" She finally manages to stand up straight and realizes she's still at school. She shakes that thought away cause that doesn't fucking matter right now and sees a brunette head being lowered until out of view. She starts to run but Rachel's car is already pulling away and driving off school grounds. She watches until it's out of view and drops her head.

"Shit."

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><p>So after Rachel had left and she stopped moping like a dumbass, she had gone back to her car, intent on calling the girl. That is until she found out she didn't even have her number. It felt awesome knowing she couldn't call her or go over to her place without her dads probably wondering what the fuck she was doing there after all she had done to their baby girl.<p>

Except no. It really did not.

She was intent on calling one of the other glee club members but as soon as she got home her mom had this like, surprise dinner party for one of their friends or something- and what the fuck, you know? Since when did her parents have people over?

Anyway she got stuck on being some little caterer. God, it was horrible. But after wards her mom gave her some dough for the trouble (and because she felt bad that she'd be leaving her little _Anita _home alone again for a cruise). Whatever. At least she could do whatever she felt like for the next five or six days.

She readjusts the strap on her backpack as she strolls over to where Rachel is, determined to talk to her and understand just what the heck is going on with them.

"Berry."

Rachel turns from looking inside her locker, and raises her eyebrow at her. "Oh, so now we're back to _Berry_, is it?"

"_Rachel_, fuck, sorry." Cool, she just apologized, way to already be whipped.

"What is it?" She says it like she hasn't got the time and like, shit, _excuse_ her for trying to talk stuff out. She steps closer to the girl and she notices the little gasp Rachel lets out.

"I just- what the fuck was that yesterday?" The shorter girl steps back with an incredulous look on her face and she tentatively puts her hand on Rachel's arm to stop her from just walking away completely. "Wait, no. I mean, you just- you left before I could, you know, give back." She shrugs sheepishly.

Rachel's eyes widen in surprise. "Oh."

Oh?

_Oh? _

Like she wouldn't reciprocate? God, this girl really must think she's like the biggest asshole in the world.

"And another thing, what's up with you acting all- I don't even know. Different?"

Rachel gets that mad look on her face and damn it she really needs to learn how to speak to this girl. "I'm sorry, was I not sexy enough for you?"

"That's so not what I meant, Rach, and you know it." Rachel rears back a little at the nickname but Santana only ignores it. It's not a big deal _ok._ Christ, after what happened yesterday afternoon, nothing Santana could possibly say to her could be bigger than that. She stuffs her hands in her pockets and just looks to the side. "You've just been acting different lately and it's kind of freaking me out, ok?"

Rachel's lips quirk up in a shy smile when she looks back at her and she figures telling the truth, no matter how sappy, is a great thing. "I only did it so I could get your attention."

And then Santana's taking a step forward, because what the fuck do you say to that? Does she mean it for sex? Or does Rachel really like her? Whatever. If any of the past few days are any indication, and fuck, really, she's not like a total idiot, then she's going to throw shit to the wind or however that saying goes and totally go for it. She takes her hands out of her pockets and rests them on the girls hips, leaning just a little bit more into her and loving the fact that Rachel's blushing.

"I like you when you're _you. _I may act like you're the craziest, loudest piece of work ever, but, it's only because you kind of are." She says it with a smile on her face so that Rachel doesn't get the wrong idea, _again_, and lightly squeezes the hips in her hands when Rachel's come up to rest on her collar. "You're not like the other girls, and that's what I- well, like about you."

Rachel fists her shirt at the top, and she's feeling that tingly sensation in her balls start to run all the way to the tip of her _juanita _from how intimate and hot this feels_,_ but she ignores it because this is not the time for that.

"Do you really like me?"

Santana scoffs. "Are you really asking me this as a serious question?"

There's a giggle and a bright smile and she drops her forehead on the brunettes, kinda liking the fact that her nose is kissing Rachel's. "I just want to hear you say it is all," Rachel whispers right onto her lips.

And damn, her eyes bounce all around _her_ girls face at that (cause they're totally going to be girlfriends so yeah, _her_ girl) and settles on Rachel's eyes. "Yeah, I really do like you," she murmurs.

It's not how people always say it is, like it's some big moment. But when Rachel lightly kisses her lips, she feels that stupid (it's actually not) feeling around her heart feel heavy in the good way.

This moment doesn't have huge fireworks going off in the back of her eyelids, but little musical numbers that just maybe means a little more than the usual.

And it definitely doesn't automatically mean that they're going to last, but maybe she doesn't want to think about that because she's actually wanting to try and that's all that can matter.

"Good, because you're mine and it'd kind of suck if I had to have you against your will." She chuckles at Rachel's soft an' silly whisper and grabs her hand as she hears the bell ring, already making plans for them to hang out while her mom's gone and-

"Hey, I'm really going to need your phone number now." Rachel laughs quietly at her and walks in the opposite direction with a quick kiss to her cheek. "I was being totally serious!"

Whatever, she's got time.


	2. Chapter 2

**So here's that second part I was talking about forever ago. Anyway, it's just been sitting forever in my folder since like february, and I thought, well ok, should probbbably finish this, so here it is lol sorry if there a lot of mistakes. Hope it's all well and good enough :) enjoy.**

**P.s. Kudos to anyone who catches the Gabriel Iglesias reference :D**

**Also, warning for drug use (the good green stuff ;) ). And i've noticed that some writers exaggerate the way it affects their characters so i'm sorry if mine isn't seeing colors or whatever the fuck. At least from my experience, it just makes me hungry, giggly, and horny. So, yeah. Anyway. **

So, they manage to go about four months before her mom barges in the room without any knocking. Which is pretty miraculous if you ask her. And as if that weren't embarrassing enough, they're not really even doing anything bad.

Like, at all.

And ok, it's really _not_ so embarrassing. But, she's serenading her girl and this sorta thing calls for privacy, you know?

And yeah, she's singing to her cause she messed up. As much as she'd like to say this isn't a regular thing (her saying stupid shit she doesn't mean), it kind of is. Thing is, Rachel knows she's _trying_, and it's cool that she understands most of the time. But it frustrates the fuck out of Santana because- because, well isn't it supposed to like, be natural _not_ to be a raging bitch when you're in love?

She's starting to think something's wrong with her.

Anyway, nothing bad about her serenading Rachel. Except for the fact that her mom _squeals_ like someone's fucking died as soon as she hears that her little girl is singing in _spanish_ for Rachel and god, it's not like she could have stopped (even though her ma totally just fucked it up) cause she knows Rachel is all about performances, and not finishing it would probably annoy her too.

It's even more messed up because when she's done singing, Rachel is squealing with her mom and talking in hushed whispers like they're totally cooking something up. And she _would_ break it up but it's kinda nice that her mom has taken a liking to her girlfriend.

So, she's just gonna let that go.

Also, the cookies and brownies they make together is just about the most amazing thing to ever happen.

It's the _next_ month that her mom totally goes batshit crazy and gets on her ass for not already like, fricking having children with the girl or something and it freaks her out cause she's telling her not to fuck it up while Rachel's _right_ behind her door, probably listening to the whole thing.

Fucking conspiracy, totally a gang up, she _knew_ it.

Ugh.

But oh no, no. Then _this_ happens when her mom asks if Rachel's there at the house and she say's no (which she only did because then they'd both be scheming again and that's a no go)-

"So she's not here? Where is she? How come you're not with her? Did you guys have a fight? What's the story? So help me_ Santa Maria _if you messed this up Anita, because how long have you been together? A few months? What's up? What's the deal? _Jesu_ _Christo_, you're not engaged already? You know when I got engaged? So what's going on? What's the word? She doesn't have a ring? How come she doesn't have a ring? Betty has a ring and she's a _puta!_ _How come she doesn't have a ring?_-"

Her mom is breathing really heavily when Rachel opens the door behind her slowly. When she turns to look at her, Rachel looks just as wild as her ma does and she starts to think, oh _no_, because now they're _both_ gonna go wack on her ass but Rachel just looks at her, and then her mom, and places a comforting hand on the back of her mom's arm, patting it and looking at her with sympathetic eyes.

"Ms. Lopez, I think it's time you went on another vacation."

And Santana nods like crazy, because, um, _yeah obviously._

And her mom just finally _breathes_ and nods as well, "Yeah, yeah ok." She starts to walk away, mumbling to herself like a _locita_ about being too young to be going so crazy about something like this which makes her eyes roll because excuse me, _she's _too young? What about the ring and the babies that she wanted her to have with Rac- ugh, whatever. Mama just needs a break from the cray cray.

So this is where she's at now, the day after that freak out, waving at her mom from the front door with Rachel hugged to her side, also waving. It almost feels like they're waving at her from _their_, hers and Rachel's, house, like her mom just visited them for Christmas break in New York and now has to leave back to Lima.

Almost.

Because now she's back from La la land (the one that's been visited quite frequently), and pulling her girlfriend back inside the house, up the stairs and getting her list for the party they'll be having later.

So like, don't get her wrong, she really would love to spend all her time with Rachel. Those few days alone after the locker thing were great for them just to- to _be._ To get to actually know a little bit more about each other- and yeah, totally make out and fool around because come on. _But_ she hasn't had a party since she got with her and that's a real problem because- well, just cause. She doesn't need a reason damn it, shut up.

Do you _know_ her?

Well.

OK.

_OK,_ so, _maybe_ she has an ulterior motive. But it's only because people sometimes don't realize they're together at school- which can she just say, _fuck that shit_? Because christ, who _doesn't_ know by now? Whatever. People are coming, she doesn't care who. All status or no status, they're coming so that they know she and Rachel are not on the market.

"Baby, you're mumbling like your mom again."

Her head snaps back to Rachel's, gives her what she hopes is the best frown and angry looking face she can muster up. All it really manages to do is make Rachel laugh all cutely though.

She crosses her arms, the list now safely folded into the pocket of her jeans. "Stop it, I was not."

Rachel walks over to her and wraps her arms around Santana's neck, softly scratching the back of her neck, and fuck, that spot always gets her. "Aww, you're adorable when you pout," She mumbles, giving her lips a light kiss.

"Babe." She frowns harder, and then thinks better of it because whatever, being adorbs is totally not a bad thing when she gets kisses for it. So she turns that frown upside down- oh my god, that did not just pass through her mind. She _smiles_ and tugs Rachel closer, pouting a little more. "I'm _totally_ not being crazy like my mom. I think you're just going delusional."

She laughs and pushes at Santana's shoulders, "Right." Then, she's pulled back in by the hand, thumbs rubbing over her cheeks. "But just for the record, I thought it was cute." She gets her bottom lip sucked softly and she smiles upon feeling Rachel smile as well. "And you know how much I love it when you act all cute like."

"Mm, ok." Rachel giggles at her, but you know what, she's not even trippin. This being all dazed and confused and swaying in her place thing is totally normal now every time Rachel gives her these kind of kisses. And she doesn't want to seem too naive but it's moments like these that make her think maybe Rachel could be in love with her too.

But there's no time to think about that when time's a tickin and the party is in a few hours, so she presses a quick kiss to the side of Rachel's lips, grabs her hand, and treks her way out.

–

"So who's being invited to this party of yours?" She shifts her hips away from Rachel's hand, giving her a quick look to tell her to 'stop it', and ignores the 'innocent' look on her face. They've got all the food and non-alcoholic beverages stocked up in the back of her car. She's made it a BYO for the rest: Booze and weed being the main ones, because she's not about to go all out on that shit when she doesn't know half the people that're gonna be there.

Rachel's hand comes back to her thigh and her grip around the steering wheel tightens. Does she _not _remember what she did to Santana the day before they got together? Because yeah, it's been five months, but she's still got to fight off the instinctive boner she always gets when she sits in her car. She plasters on a smile though, not about to let Rachel make her veer off and crash the damn car and end up killing them. "You mean _our _party."

Her girlfriend just smirks at her, totally catching on what it is she's trying to do, and retracts her hand. She smiles back because duh, of course Rachel totally remembers. "Alright, so _our _party. Who will be there?"

"Oh, you know...everyone."

Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Rachel's brow furrow. Damn it, she totally wants to kiss the cute right off her face. "What do you mean, 'everyone'?"

She laughs. "Babe, _everyone. _The whole school for all I care. This could be like the coming out party we never had, show everyone we're together you know?...make sure everyone gets the fucking point that you're not single anymore." She grumbles that last part, still a little ticked that Jack Anderson tried to put the moves on _her girlfriend _just a week ago.

Rachel giggles and cups her cheek, stroking her jaw and effectively simmering her down. "_Tana_, as long as you know I'm yours, and we're together and fine, then I say that's all that matters." She says it in that super cute way that means she _really_ needs to kiss her now because- because _reasons _damn it.

So she leans over, and Rachel turns knowingly, gently pressing their lips together. Rachel's fingers stroke her jaw just a little harder and she groans, pulling back because she's still driving and really- she's not about to crash, when she's minutes away from home, and be another statistic on the "Women can't drive" front.

Ha ha ha- _no_. She knows how to drive, thank you.

"Although, it would be nice for girls to stop trying to-" A small hand slaps over her crotch and she squeals, jumping a little in her seat, happy that she's in her neighborhood now and not on the fucking highway because _what the he-_ "do this every time you walk by them."

"_Mujer_!" Rachel _laughs_ at her expression, and pats her cheek, opening the passenger door as soon as she's parked and getting out. "That's not really nice, you know!"

She palms poor _juanita _for a consoling second and leans down to pop open the trunk, rolling her eyes at the little laughs her girlfriend's letting out. She gets out and comes around, slapping Rachel's ass and smiling satisfyingly at the high, "San!" squeak, that comes out.

"Rach, that actually kind of hurt, so don't get all butthurt that I got you back." She smirks at her choice of words while Rachel hip checks her.

"Yeah, whatever, help me with the rest of the stuff and I'll let you do that thing with my butt."

It's said so casual, but her eyes go wide and she stops for a second, scrunching her eyes back at Rachel with all the seriousness she can muster, and lowly says, "You promise?"

She can tell Rachel's trying to stifle a giggle but oh my god, this is _not a joke._ And she almost jumps her girl when she plays along, her face set with reserve, and she nods once, all seriousness in her voice as well when she says, "You bet your ass I promise."

Two whole seconds pass by before Rachel starts laughing maniacally, running away as soon as she hears her growl.

Santana goes after her with the stupidest smile on her face, groceries in hand.

–

Ok, really.

It's hard having a super hot girlfriend.

And it's not the she's complaining but- damn, it's hard having a super hot girlfriend.

For one, she has to control the urge to ravage Rachel at all times. Like when she's just woken up, or when she's tired, or when she has her period (which really doesn't bother her at all, but apparently Rachel's not into that so.), and etc. Secondly, super hot people who don't know that they're super hot don't always know when people are flirting with them. Thirdly, people hit on Rachel and don't care about the person she's with.

Case in point, right the fuck now.

It's only maybe like, an hour and a half into the stupid party, and _Jack_ fucking _Anderson_, the prick, is talking to Rachel. She's made it a point not to get jealous, because she _trusts_ Rachel and she doesn't want to be an asshole who's turned all possessive and doesn't let her talk to people. That's not what she's trying to do.

That's not who she _is_, because she always hated when her other friends had that happen to them, like Britt and Artie.

But _ugh_, she can't help it if she wants to just go over there and slap the dumb smirk off his face and take Rachel away.

She _hates_ that he thinks he has a chance, because he _doesn't. _Everyone has got to know by now, well anyone who was there when Rachel and her kissed and she yelled out that they were together, since people also came after that. The point is that he should know because they've both been making it a point to somehow include their relationship status into every convo they have with other people.

Like, "Oh, you like ham and cheese? My girlfriend, Rachel, doesn't. She's vegan and fit and pretty and look at her over there, you see her? Yeah she's my _girlfriend_."

Or, "What was that, you're from Lima Heights Adjacent? So is my girlfriend, Santana, have you met her? She's the beautiful one over there."

So yeah, she was pretty sure they were a known couple now.

Only- only Jack's fucking hand just touched Rachel's.

Her brow furrows and she clenches the drink in her hand, inhaling the warm scent of weed wafting in from the other room. She is not about to go over there and wrap her arms around Rachel like she's her property. Nope. It was just her hand and she trusts Rachel with her heart. So when Rachel looks over towards her and nods, like everything's fine, she smiles back, not even worried about the dumbass.

Watching them isn't going to help quell her desire to kick his face in though, so _why not_ go smoke a dub with some people? Mary Jane always-

"Hey! Get off the fucking chandelier! Those things aren't cheap, you asshole!" She smacks her own forehead lightly and walks away once the idiot falls off and people rush over to him.

_Damn_, she really needs to de-stress.

–

Rachel is- is like a goddess or something. She has to be, because when her hazy eyes focus in on something swaying her way, after all the people have left, she notes that Rachel is kind of glowing.

In the back of her mind, she thinks ( it definitely is) maybe it could be the fireplace off to the side but she could care less right now because she's warm and tingly, kinda sleepy, and just a little bit ( ok, _a lot_) horny from being so high and having a seriously gorgeous girlfriend.

As Rach comes closer, her hands lift up slowly, trying to reach out and grab onto her. She needs Rachel on her _now._ It helps that she's slumped on the couch, so when Rachel, who's giggling at her because she most likely looks like a clown with the dopey smile she's sporting _which_ she's _trying_ to make look sexy thank you very much, is within reach, she weakly tugs her onto her lap.

"Oh!" Rachel squeaks.

"Mm, yeah." she mumbles out. Again, she's being laughed at a little but she doesn't mind. "S'cute."

"What?" Rachel hands start to rub up and down her collar bone and she hums, content with how the slightly cold fingers make her tingle.

"Said you're cute, baby." She tries peering up at Rachel, but her eyes don't make it that far before they stop at her neck. Her hands squeeze just a tad forcefully on Rachel's lower back to scoot her forward before sliding them around her hips and pushing back, her lower half starting to feel trapped inside her jeans, half hard and wanting out.

"Honey, no, you're drunk."

She wants to laugh, so she does, and lifts herself up with all the strength her mellowed out body has, nipping at the pulse point on Rachel's neck that she's been staring at. "No, m'not," she sing songs.

Rachel's chest pushes against her lower neck with a slight chuckle, and her face is brought out of the warm confines of her neck. She gives off a slight pout, which her girl quickly kisses so she pouts some more.

"Santana," Rachel giggles, "do not tell me you are high right now!" She sounds indignant, but not pissed off or anything so she just shrugs her shoulders and keeps on pouting.

"Baby, did you _want_ me to stay pissed off the whole night for the _Jack-ass_," she snorts lightly at her own joke and kisses at the chin in front of her, "even touching you and talking to you? Pisses me off that he even _thinks_ he can get wit chu and naw, uh uhh, i'ont think so!"

"Tana, calm down!" She's laughing again, but Santana's being totally serious right now. "Don't start with your Lima Heights talk, baby, you're gonna ruin the mood."

Her eyebrow lazily pops up, smirking at the coy little look being directed at her as one of the hands on her collar travels down to clutch at the belt buckle digging into Rachel's stomach lightly. "Mood? What mood would that be, mi amor?"

"Oh, I absolutely_ love_ when you speak spanish to me." The small hand jiggles the buckle before undoing it swiftly, and her own hand comes down from Rachel's hip to unbuckle and unzip Rachel's pants as well.

By now Rachel has taken it upon herself to start grinding on her a little, the whole atmosphere feeling that much more intimate. Everything is so amped up, yet slow and warm and she suddenly doesn't know whether she wants to have sex or cuddle. Her eyes slowly widen at the predicament, not sure if the boner she has can withstand waiting so long if it turns out the she really does _only _want to cuddle.

She doesn't want to disappoint Rachel for getting her all wet and not wa- well. She _could _always eat her out.

"I wish I had come and found you when you took off." It's a hot whisper near her forehead, the hand still on her collar now coming around behind her neck and lightly scratching. She can't help but shiver, and she decides right then that, cuddling, can go _after_ sex.

God, she was brilliant.

Barely remembering that Rachel had said something, she whimpers when the girl gets off of her. She was starting to think maybe her girlfriend was gonna dry hump it out. And then she whimpers again when she realizes that it's so Rachel can take off her clothes. Her head snaps up from looking at boobs, which _hello_, when a lusty whisper of, "I'm gonna ride you like a bull," mumbles out of Rachel's mouth distractedly as she's slipping her underwear down.

And oh my god, she can feel her eyes dilating.

She would laugh, because honey pie sugar bunch say _what_, but she's really too horny to even. So with a giddy little smile and chink feeling eyes, she starts shrugging off her own clothes.

Rachel beats her, and climbs back on her once she's achieved taking her pants off, and Rachel quickly takes over taking her out of her shirt and bra. And then Rachel kind of just stares at her tits, her own chest slightly heaving because she feels so _hot _right now and the stupid fireplace isn't helping her breathe and she really just needs her girlfriends to do something, anything.

So, she wiggles, wanting to remind Rachel that there's still the matter of her boxers being on, but then abruptly stops once her boob is in a soft and warm hand.

"U-um, Rachel, baby, i-i..." At this point she knows she sounds like an idiot, but really, it's not her fault. She's being grinded on, an 'her _pobre juanita_ can feel the warm wetness seeping through the thin cloth and _ugh_. A hand is on one of her tits, just gripping it and there's that thing where- oh yes, she is _high and horny._

So really, it's Rachel's fault she's making a fool of herself.

But of course her girlfriend doesn't care. "Tana, honey, your breasts are perfect, you know that?" it's like a breathy moan and _wow_, she needs air. A moan rips out of her chest when the hand finally squeezes, fingers lightly pinching her nipple and the hand behind her neck coming down to play with the other.

She needs to kiss her, like _needs to_ because those lips shouldn't be off of hers unless they're on a different part of her body and visa versa.

She promises to make it a rule afterward (if she remembers).

When her eyes slip back open (when did they close?), Rachel's forehead is on hers, and-and she's got this like smirky smirk playing on her lips that it's impossible not to smile back and slide her own hands up her girl's fit body so that her hands are skirting around the place where they both want them the most so she can feel like she's got a reason to smirk too. But Rachel's always got like one up on her or whatever cause she just _sighs_ and Santana gives in and touches her, rubbing her fingers over hard nipples and tugging a little on them. It's ridiculous having Rachel's lips like a millimeter away, really, and not touching them, so she kisses her all lazy like and smooth, a small tongue making her lips part immediately.

She doesn't even fight off the groan when plump lips suck on her tongue. It's so _fucked_ for her to start thinking about them being on her dick, but come on. They're so perfect, all puffy and pink and _soft _and _good_ at what they do, how could she not think about that?She's pretty sure Rachel's thinks about her own lips being on her clit and eating her out when they kiss too, so whatever.

Rachel pulls on her lower lip with teeth for being distracted and she slinks one hand down with a last nipple pinch to help push Rachel's hips back and forth over her boner and Rachel kisses her harder for that.

She about faints because Jesus, those _lips._

"Need'a get those insured, baby."

"Hm?" There's an _amused_ smirk on her face now, and she_ would _roll her eyes but her boobs are in Rachel's hands and she's getting some friction and both of them are breathing real heavy so, not really a problem right now.

"O-_oh_ god- _Rae_," her thighs push up when nails rake down her abs, and fuck if that doesn't get her hyped up even more. She knows Rachel only does that when she's done with foreplay because she's wet as it is and needs it _now_. And her boxers are all ruined from Rachel's wet center rubbing up and down, but she ain't even mad because- "Guhh," b-because something, _something_. "Yeah, just like that."

Wow, she sounds stupid as fuck but Rachel doesn't seem to mind, just whimpers right back, and _that_ is what makes her snap out of it. That sound, her voice, just, god just hearing her sing gets her hard. And it kind of wierded her out at first when she realized Rachel wasn't really one for talking when they were getting down to it like she thought she would be. Kind of made her sad too, but shut up, can't hate her for loving everything about the girl ok?

God.

But Rachel knows she loves it when she gets vocal so she'll indulge her from time to time.

So, yeah, that little whimper makes her hands go tighter around her girl's waist for half a second before sliding down around her sexy thighs and lifting her up. There's a squeak in her ear and even that almost ruins her so she quickly sets her down on the carpet, and chucks her boxers off.

"Sex by the fireplace?" Santana doesn't even realize it, but she nods and whispers a 'yeah', "it would be more romantic if you weren't high, but I'll accept it." She groans, cause jesus, she's so sexy. Rachel's long, smooth legs wrap around her middle, hips rising to slide against her stomach and arms going up behind her head, fingers clutching at the carpet just waiting.

"I'll make sure to- _fuck-_ sure to- _Rachel_, baby, I'm trying to-" she trails off with a moan, her forehead creasing, hips still coming up and rubbing her pussy against her lower stomach, heels digging into her ass to get her closer to her. An' she can't blame Rach, cause all she's doing is caressing slightly trembling thighs, softness on her fingertips.

"Honey, if you don't sex me up right now, I swear to Barbra I'm going to do it myself..." she sounds whiny and frustrated and all hot and bothered, and it all just makes her head spin. She's so hard she doesn't even need to line up, just moves her hips up and down to stroke the head through Rachel's sticky pussy quickly, and then just pushing right in, lights behind her eyes exploding at all- all the _everything _that she's feeling. "Ohh, _yes," _Rachel sighs, small hips undulating underneath her.

_Fuuuuck _drones in her head, eyes trying to stay open to watch Rachel's tits bounce, her body mesmerizing and tight but soft, just perfect. She wants to keep it slow and build it up to the point where Rachel'll want to just go insane, and then fuck her _hard_.

But that goes out the window when one of those perfect little hands comes up from the carpet and scratches up the middle of her chest to clutch at the back of her neck, tugging at her hair to come down.

Her arms wobble and collapse, bending to her elbows and she stops at Rachel's bouncing breasts, taking the left one in her mouth and sucking for all she's worth, working her hips in circles, knowing Rachel's going to go crazy once she hits that spot in four, three, two-

"San! _Oh, oh!_" She smirks and grunts around her nipple, eyes rolling back at Rachel's breath blowing over hear ear, whispering all the dirty little things she's going to do to Santana later, and if it's one thing to scratch down her abs, it's entirely another to kiss her ear and whisper to her cause that revs her up to a whole 'nother level.

"Oh god, oh god, Rachel, fuck! You feel so _good _babe, so fucking good," she whispers out near her neck, nuzzling her jaw and kissing her way up to those perfect lips and letting Rachel dominate her while she's pistoning in 'n out like it's her day job.

This definitely isn't going to last any longer.

Her dick is throbbing and her balls are tight as fuck, and so is Rachel's pussy for that matter. It's choking her so deliciously, trying to push her out and she's going to thank Rachel every damn day for going on birth control so that she can experience this.

She feels out of her mind when Rachel breaks off the kiss to throw her head back, eyebrows scrunched up and mouth open as she starts to breathe even more erratically. _God fucking damn it_, she pushes up and wraps one arm around a quivering thigh, grips it for all it's worth, and uses the other to rapidly rub and knead and flick at Rachel's clit, frantic now to give her girl an awesome orgasm.

Repeats of 'Ugh' and 'Santana' and 'Oh' starts to tumble out of Rachel's perfect mouth, voice going higher. She's not going to go first, she wants Rachel to _scream_, so she waits it out a little more, feeling the heels on her ass digging into her harder and the hand on the back of her neck scratches down her back as Rachel all of a sudden jolts up and _trembles_.

And that sets her off, pretty much breaking as her frame shivers at the feeling of hers and Rachel's juices all around her dick. Her hands quickly wrap around her girl's still shaking form and holds her close, messily kissing her neck as hands knead her shoulders.

A few seconds pass by and she sighs, dopey smile finding her face again.

"That was _such_ a good fuck, babe." A hand slaps her shoulder, lips kissing away the light sting a moment later.

"Mm, no complaints here."

"Want to do it again?" She looks at kiss swollen lips, feeling herself get hard again inside Rachel. Her arms tense when she feels muscles clench all around her. "Fuh- _Amor_."

Rachel's eyes light up and soft hands caress her chest as those pink lips dart a quick kiss against her cheek. Just as she's about to pull out to get up and pick her up bridal style, a grumbling sound rumbles out between them. Her eyes go wide and she looks at Rachel.

"Um..."

A giggle kisses her ear, "Munchies?"

"Aha, yeah, hungry and horny, just like Faith says."

Rachel's brow shoots up, "Or how about: hungry, horny, and high, just like Santana is?"

"Whatever, s'not like it happens every day," she mumbles, kissing at Rachel's jaw and neck distractedly.

"Come on hon'," Rachel smiles, patting her stomach lovingly, "Let's get us something to eat, and we'll see if you're still up for some more."

She whines when Rachel gets up slowly, her cock getting slightly cold from being out of the warmth. Her clothes are ruined and so are Rachel's for that matter, so she shrugs and tilts her head a little ways to watch Rachel walk to the kitchen ahead of her buck naked.

And then she hears a familiar squeak and then Rachel's running back to her, which _hello again_ boobies, but she shakes her head as soon as Rachel's around her.

"Santana, there's someone passed out in the kitchen!"

She rolls her eyes and frowns, taking her girl's hand and foregoing the kitchen. "Swear to god, m'never having a party here again," she grumbles out. She starts up the stairs, one step at a time because her heads still a little fuzzy.

"It's ok, love, you can just eat me out in the meantime," says Rachel mischievously, smacking her on the butt and going running up the stairs with a squeal.

She hums at the thought and fumbles up the stairs to catch up to her giggling girlfriend.

See? Totally thinks about her lips on her clit when they're kissing.


End file.
